It’s not what you become, but what you don’t become that will hurt most in the end

This article is designed to help you open your eyes to choose whether the current career path you are on in life is one that you are making out of choice, or one that you are traveling down out of blind social conditioning and lack of hope in doing what you dream about.

Given the choice between pursuing a highly desired cherished dream and continuing a life of quiet desperation, most people unconsciously choose for the life of quiet desperation. Are you one of them? Do you tolerate non-stop abusive bosses, lousy working conditions, and extremely boring dead-end jobs?

Sadly, most people opt for this grindstone-existence because it takes a lot of risk and facing of the unknown to take control of creating your own income by becoming self employed or seeking a more fulfilling career. There is no security, you have nothing to fall back on, and if things go wrong there is no one to blame but yourself.

It sounds terrible doesn’t it? Well don’t be fooled. Of course your boss and your managers all want you to think this negative so that you will stay working for them. And your family and friends usually do not know any better either so they will tell you the same things in order to keep you “safe and secure”.

The truth is that there is little security in staying in the same dead end job all of your life. Sadly, many people who come to end of their lives on their death beds reflect upon their lives with deep sorrow and not having followed their career dreams is usually their biggest regret.

What makes the situation even more difficult is the fact that throughout all of our lives our family and close friends seem to always be there to let us know that the “safest” path is one of security, working for someone else. They tell us that we should not risk our time and money venturing into creating our own businesses, goals, or risk-taking ventures. But ironically, these very same people are feeling disappointed that they do not possess the courage to take control of life and steer their own destiny.

If you are not currently pursuing your career dreams, regardless of the excuses you can come up with, then you are setting yourself up for the same disappointments and regrets that many people experience later in life. In other words, it is not what you become, but what you don’t become that will hurt you most in the end.

Popularity: 18% [?]

Release Technique Abundance Course for Eliminating Negativity

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How To Create More Closet Space

Most closets are too small. However, if you look at your closet you will see a lot of wasted space, usually below the clothes and above the clothes rod.

The logical solution is to put two bars one above the other, thus making better use of more space in the closet. To put in two bars, the top bar needs to be raised. You can do this by taking out all the wood shelves and bars and replacing them with plastic-coated, ventilated wire shelving.

There are three advantages to this type of shelving. One is that you can see what is on the high shelf more easily through the spaces between the wire. Another is that it requires less dusting since there is no solid shelf. A third is that if you wish to buy shelving without a bar, the shelf holds the clothes hangers apart evenly.

Now suppose you say, “That’s too big a job for right now. What can I do with my closet the way it is?” Let me tell you my situation. If it requires a hammer and nails and takes more than five minutes to do, I don’t do it. Neither my husband nor I are handy with building things and the few occasions when I have had someone do it for me have been unsatisfactory. So I look for easy-to-install “ready-builts”. In this case, add another shelf to the top of the closet with boxes and a board in order to make use of the empty space up there.

Of course, that shelf will be pretty much out of reach so you should use it to store only seldom used things. The unused space at the bottom of the closet can be utilized as a basket storage system. Look in department stores for suitable baskets. An easy-to-install lower bar can be hung from the one above by two chains. Look in catalogs for this. A low bar in the closet helps the children get in the hanging-up habit, too.

Now comes what I think is the most chronic problem of the clothes closet - shoes. If they are left on the floor, even if they are on a wire floor rack with a hump for each shoe, they are unsightly, gather dust, and make it impossible to dust easily. There are several solutions. I keep the boxes the shoes come in and stack them with the shoes in the bottom of the closet. I
write in large letters on the outside of the box a description of the shoes. When I get my shoes out I leave the top ajar and the box pulled out a little so I will know where to put them back. It works well for me.

Popularity: 17% [?]

Planning For Retirement

Three Critical Decisions about Your Retirement Wise retirement planning is not all numbers. There is a huge emotional component to it, reflecting the fact that retiring involves one of life’s most profound periods of change. No one really knows in advance how he or she will weather the process. That is why some people enter a period of prolonged depression, convinced that once a career ends, useful living stops, too.

For others, the transition is so easy that anyone observing them might think such individuals were born to retire. At any rate, three crucial decisions that many pre-retirees must make vividly display the mix of financial and emotional elements. They are:

1. Knowing when you should retire.

2. Sizing up an early-out offer from your employer.

3. Deciding between taking a lump-sum pension and an annuity.

Recent studies indicate that about 25% of retirees are unhappy, primarily because they had not been ready to retire. For some, the decision had not been theirs to make. But in general, at the end of a long career most people think they are headed for freedom and do not stop to consider whether the free time they’ll have will lie heavy on them or be the prolonged vacation they envision.

Retirement planners say that six months or so after quitting work, reality sets in. To make sure that retirement is a welcome reality, weigh carefully the decision to call it quits. Look for the two prime signals that you are ready to retire: (1) You find it harder and harder to keep your mind on your work; and (2) You view retirement not as a passive vacation, but as an active adventure.

Be honest with yourself and admit just how rigid you might be in your life as it is at present. The more averse you are to change, the more you will have to work on making the transition bearable. If your employer provides retirement planning seminars, take advantage of them. They are apt to address emotional as well as financial issues. If such seminars are not available, seek them elsewhere, perhaps through community groups.

Popularity: 10% [?]

Make Every Day Special With Feng Shui

When you pay the kind of attention to order, aesthetics, and positive emotion that are a part of decorating a space according to feng shui traditions, you make every day special. Feng shui is the ancient art of creating harmony in your environment so that you will be able to live a balanced and beautiful life. Having this goal reflected everywhere you look within your home will help you feel pleased and contented throughout the day. With feng shui, you can learn to cherish the balance and beauty of each moment, even when you are going about tasks that used to feel mundane and ordinary.

Many of us have experienced the difference that improving our home or workplace atmosphere can make in our attitude. Think of the last time you decorated for a party, and how good it made you feel to infuse your environment with a feeling of festivity and celebration. Feng shui works in much the same way. With feng shui, you place objects with the goal of changing the energy in a room so that it will be more positive. Feng shui creates a feeling of balance, which helps give a space an orderly and peaceful arrangement so that you will feel calm and happy when you are there. This can help you look forward to every day, not just holidays.

With feng shui, it is easy to make your home or office feel like a special place even if you don’t know the first thing about interior design or aesthetics. When you decorate according to feng shui tradition, you follow a set of simple rules that will guide you as you create an environment that you and your loved ones will enjoy spending time in. Using feng shui as a guide to improving the look and feeling of an area will help you make the right decisions about everything from furniture placement to light sources. With feng shui, you will learn to create beauty so that you can enjoy it on a daily basis. When you re-create your home environment or your work space according to feng shui principles, you will be increasing the aesthetic pleasure that you get at all times.

There is no limit to how much incorporating feng shui into your home or workplace can improve your quality of life, or increase your happiness and sense of peace. Many people don’t think of themselves as aesthetically sensitive, but you will never know how much of a negative impact your décor and furniture arrangements may be having on you until you change them for the better and enjoy the results. When you spend time in an area decorated in a feng shui style, you will feel lucky to be a part of such a calm, ordered, and harmonious environment. With feng shui responsible for surrounding you with beauty on all sides, even the simplest tasks can become a treat.

Further Reading:
http://www.fengshuitips.co.uk/
http://www.viewzone.com/fengshui.html

Popularity: 12% [?]

What Does Your Self-Talk Say About You?

Anything you say out loud to yourself, or to someone else about yourself, or about anything else, is part of your self-talk and represents how you feel about yourself. Also, what you say when you are speaking makes up an important part of the pictures and directions you are feeding to your subconscious mind. It makes sense that if what you say when you are speaking paints the wrong pictures or delivers commands which give yourself counterproductive information, the end result will be that your brain will act on the information in a way that could work against you in any number of ways.

Telling a friend that you don’t like your job cannot possibly help your job. You may make yourself feel better by getting it off your chest, and in most forms of therapy, that technique is used with some success. But how much better it would be if you were to change your attitude by changing the programming you were giving yourself, especially in those circumstances when the job (or any situation) isn’t going to change just by complaining about it.

Your self-talk is at the heart of something we call “acceptance.” There are times in life when all of us feel compelled to put up with a bad situation. But it is completely up to you whether you let that situation work against you, or make a mental decision to see it in a different way. Your self-speak, and other forms of self-talk, are the determining factor in whether the real you, the inside you, wins or loses.

We make hundreds of comments or statements in any given day. It might not seem all that important to phrase each of the many things you say each day in some positive way. But consider that each of those statements is a directive to your subconscious mind. Then add up those comments and statements over a week, a month, or a year. They add up to tens of thousands of minor but very important subconscious self-directives. They’re important all right; they have a whole lot to do with what you accomplish, how you feel, and who you become.

The easiest way to determine which of the people around you are the real winners at life and which are not, is to listen to their self-speak; what they say when they talk about anything. Winners use self-speak to build an attitude that produces winning results. It doesn’t mean that “winners” don’t have problems. It doesn’t mean that every day for them is a perfect day. But look at their average scores in winning at life over a few months or a few years. The better their self-speak, the better their score. The more positive their approach, the more successful the results. In time, positive self-speak becomes as much an automatic habit as walking, moving, eating, or sleeping. And when positive self-speak becomes a habit, so do the successes which the self-speak creates.

Popularity: 15% [?]

Internal Memory Techniques: How They Work

Internal memory techniques are very powerful ways to learn and remember information. Let’s look at how they work:

* They force you to focus attention on what you are trying to learn. When you apply an internal memory technique, you are forced to concentrate. In fact, just using a technique makes it impossible not to pay attention. And we already know that we absorb something we want to remember more effectively when we attend to it.

* They give meaning to what you are trying to learn. Internal memory techniques are successful because they give meaning to something you want to remember. This works in two ways: In many cases, we can find meaning inherent to the information we are trying to learn. Or we can impose meaning on material that doesn’t necessarily have that meaning to make it more memorable. And something that is meaningful is more memorable.

Some of you may believe internal memory techniques are simply too complicated for you. If so, think again. Chances are you already use some of these methods without even knowing it. Take a look at these examples:

1. What year did Columbus sail for America? Did you say 1492? That’s correct. Chances are you got there by reciting the following rhyme: “In 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue.” Rhymes such as these are a popular internal memory technique.

2. How can you remember the correct spelling of the word “stationery”? Well, if in fourth grade you learned the saying, “Stationery is for a letter,” you were given a way of connecting the correct spelling of stationery with another word you already knew the proper spelling for. English teachers loved these connection techniques for learning proper spelling.

3. Here’s one from the history books. Need to remember what happened to the wives of Henry VIII? Perhaps someone taught you the following rhyme for recalling their fates: Divorced, beheaded, died; divorced, beheaded, survived.

4. Trying to remember the colors of the rainbow? Consider the following first letter association, which my son learned in his kindergarten class: ROY G. BIV. This name is made up of the first letter of each color in the rainbow: red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, and violet.

You can see from these examples that internal memory techniques are really part of our everyday world. So don’t be afraid of these methods. They can be simple to learn and use, and can help you remember better. The goal of any memory technique is to help you learn an internal memory technique that you like and will use.

Popularity: 32% [?]

Tailoring A Self-Help Program For Our Children

The principles for overcoming social anxiety and low self-esteem you read about for adults also apply to young people. Your job as a parent is to provide support, motivate your child to work on overcoming social anxiety, provide your child with opportunities for exposure, and offer your child encouragement and praise when he or she succeeds. Below are 3 ways you can implement an exposure plan with your child:

1. Be a coach. When an opportunity presents itself for your child to say something to another child or an adult, encourage him to speak up. For example, when you order food at a restaurant, ask your son to order for himself. (Let him practice with you beforehand—you can role-play that you’re the waiter or the counter attendant.) If he whispers, ask him to speak up. If he refuses, ask him to order dessert for the family later in the meal. If he can’t do it the first time, don’t get angry. Praise him for trying, and let him know that you’re going to keep on urging him to try. (Don’t withhold the dessert! The reward is for effort, not for success!) Let your child know you’re not going to give up, and you’re sure he’ll be able to do it soon. Rewards can help motivate many children to tackle tough situations. If possible, tie the reward directly to the behavior: “Tina, you may have a cookie if you go up to the counter, order it, and pay for it yourself.” For older children, the reward can be a fun activity that itself promotes further interaction with peers: “Erin, if you invite a friend over on Saturday evening, we’ll get pizza and a video” With time, your child will keep on doing these things not just for the material payoff, but because it feels good to be confident!

2. Be a matchmaker. Provide opportunities for your child to interact socially with other children. Sometimes socially anxious children don’t want to play with other kids, and they can come up with some very creative excuses. Let your child know that having friends is an important part of life. Make it a priority. Invite another child to tag along with you and your daughter, and encourage her to make conversation, to express her feelings, and to make the other child feel welcome. Encourage your daughter to invite her peers to hang out at your house.

3. Set an example. Teach your child how to handle social situations. The best way to do this is not by telling, but by showing. And the best way to show is to let your child see you do things regularly in your everyday life. Let your child see you look someone in the eye, firmly shake hands, and say “Pleased to meet you.” It can also be useful to talk out loud (to yourself, but knowing your child is listening) about how to approach a challenging social situation. For example, while getting dressed to go out to a business dinner, you might say, “I’m going to be meeting some new people tonight. I’ll be sure to say hi to everyone, even if I don’t remember all the names later.”

Popularity: 12% [?]

Learn About The Herb “Gotu kola”

Gotu kola (Centella asiatica), or centella is an herbaceous perennial plant native to India, China, Indonesia, Australia, the South Pacific, Madagascar, and southern and middle Africa. This slender, creeping plant flourishes in and around water. Although it grows best in damp, swampy areas, centella is often observed growing along stone walls or other rocky, sunny areas at elevations of approximately 2,000 feet in India and Ceylon.

The smooth-surfaced leaves, found on furrowed petioles, can reach a width of 3 centimeters and a length of 15 centimeters. The leaf margin may be smooth or slightly lobed. The fruit, formed throughout the growing season, is approximately 5 millimeters long with seven to nine ribs and a curved, strongly thickened pericarp. Historically, the entire plant is used medicinally, with harvesting occurring at any time during the year.

Centella has been used extensively as a medicine, both internally and externally, by the people of Java and other islands of Indonesia. The medicinal use of centella in India and Indonesia centered around its ability to heal wounds and relieve leprosy.

In the 19th century, centella and its extracts were incorporated into the Indian’s list of medicine, where in addition to being recommended for wound healing, it was recommended in the treatment of skin conditions such as leprosy, lupus, varicose ulcers, eczema, and psoriasis. It was also used to treat diarrhea, fever, amenorrhea, and diseases of the female genitourinary tract.

Many confuse gotu kola with kola nuts. However, gotu kola is not related to the kola nut, nor does it contain any caffeine. Centella asiatica exerts remarkable wound-healing activity. In China, the leaves are prescribed for turbid leukorrhea and toxic fevers, while the shoots are used for boils and fevers. The plant is also used in the treatment of fractures, contusions, strains, and snakebites. Centella was also used in China to delay senescence.

Considered as one of the reported “miracle elixirs of life,” gotu kola’s reputation as a promoter of longevity stems from the report of Chinese herbalist, Li Ching Yun, who’s legend states that he reportedly lived 256 years. Li Ching Yun’s longevity was supposedly a result of his regular use of an herbal mixture chiefly composed of gotu kola.

Centella asiatica was first accepted as a drug in France in the 1880s. Since then, extracts of this herb have been used all over the world in the treatment of many of the same conditions listed above.

Popularity: 12% [?]

Using The Imagination To Control Your Thoughts

The imagination is a fascinating, powerful place. For example, remember any incident from elementary school - writing with a fat pencil, perhaps. (Remember those fat pencils?) Now, think of someplace you plan to go in the next month and imagine yourself there. Good. Now, imagine yourself on the moon, looking back at the earth - a big blue marble in the blackness of space. Excellent, isn’t it?

This is the power of the imagination: we can return to the past, rehearse the future, and zoom off on flights of fancy - all within seconds.

The images you had may not have been well-detailed, or held in the imagination for very long, but you probably had some sense of each. Some people primarily see in their imaginations, others primarily hear, others primarily feel. Whatever you do is fine.

When you do not have conscience control of the imagination, it is vigorously and creatively used against us. We relive the horrors of the past - the fears that were justified, the guilts that were especially foul, the unworthinesses at their worst, the hurt feelings at their most painful, the anger at its most destructive. Considering the false history created by the mind’s careful selection and occasional rewriting, it’s easy to feel discouraged about ourselves and everything we might consider doing.

The mind also uses the imagination when considering the future. It projects an image of not just failure but monumental failure, embarrassing failure, public and unconditional failure. Considering this opposition, it’s amazing that we even get out of bed. The mind (unless you control it) also uses every news story - and every other fictional account - of disaster to show us why we had better not do anything new, ever. It’s time to recapture the imagination from your mind’s fears. Your imagination is yours. You can remember the past you choose, rehearse the future you want, and identify with the real and fictional heroes and events of your selection.

When we remember the good things from our past (and all our pasts are filled with both good and bad), we build an image of ourselves as doers and achievers - charmed, kind and terrific. This forms a solid base for future action.

When we project our dreams into a positive future, we see that we can have what we want. A positive image of the future not only shows us how to get there, it draws us to it, attracting us toward our dreams like a magnet.

When we hear some good news, read an inspirational story or see an uplifting movie, we can use our imagination to put ourselves in the center of the action. This allows us to identify with all the good, happy and wonderful images in our culture - and know that we’re one of them.

Popularity: 18% [?]

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