How To Organize Your Child’s Room To Make It More “Kid-Friendly”

While you are sitting on the floor, look for ways the room could be arranged to make it easier for a little person to manage. What about the bed? Are the sheets, blankets, and bedspread the ones adults think cute or pretty but that are hard for a child to make up neatly? Perhaps a bedspread with cording or a design marking the side edges of the bed is better.

Some children have a washable quilt that can easily be pulled up rather than having a top sheet and bedspread with it. The child can make it by just crawling up to the head of the bed, pulling up the cover, smoothing it, and slithering out.

As you are looking for ways to make the room arrangement easier, ask yourself if the child can hang up his own coat and robe. If not, maybe hooks would be easier than hangers.

You will probably want a wastebasket and some kind of clothes hamper in the room. Shoe boxes in the drawers make terrific dividers to separate socks, underwear, belts, and pajamas. As you sit on the floor evaluating, you will come up with some good ideas, but don’t forget to ask for the child’s opinion, too.

Popularity: 73% [?]

3 Ways to Enjoy Better Love-Making

Having great sex with the person you love is not only a joyous experience, but it is one that can reach new heights and excitement, so long as you understand how to communicate your needs effectively. Below are three ways to help you connect sexually with your partner:

1. Pay attention to the speed and pace at which your body responds to sex. If you are not aroused enough for sexual activity, then let your partner know. Do not be afraid to say what you would like to have happen in order to increase your stimulation.

2. Learn to explain to your partner what you like and what you need in order to be satisfied. Nothing can bring two people’s sexual experiences more closer than communication. Be open and honest. Clarity is key to getting and giving what you want out of sex.

3. If you are moving into new sexual arenas with your partner, keep in mind that it could be difficult. If your spouse or significant other makes a suggestion to you that makes you feel uncomfortable, do not immediately reject him or her. Explain why you are uncomfortable and try to modify things a bit.

Popularity: 48% [?]

Is There A Connection Between Leisure & Happiness?

Leisure is one of those luxuries that’s best in small portions. When it’s all there is to life, it’s as boring as being locked in jail. Leisure presents a terrible quandary for people with money. Either they don’t have enough of it because they’re always working, or they don’t work at all and are drowning in it.

All of us, to some extent, create fairy tales about how good life must be for wealthy people, because we get vicarious pleasure from it, and because we think we might someday strike it rich. One of the tales we tell ourselves is that wealth and leisure are a comfortable, complementary pair. Science shows that that’s usually not true.

The vast majority of millionaires in America are self-made, and one of the primary ways they gain their wealth is by sacrificing their leisure and freedom. I’ve met hundreds of these people, and they almost all work extremely hard - probably even harder than you do. Next time you walk through the first-class cabin on an airplane, check out how many of the passengers have their faces buried in paperwork or laptops. Is that your idea of leisure? Most of these people don’t feel free; they feel frazzled.

All too often, people become financially successful by just following money - engaging in high paying jobs they don’t really like. They may look free, but they feel like prisoners. When happy people choose their jobs, they don’t follow money - they follow their passions. When they do this, they tend not to worry too much about money, even if they’re relatively poor, because they know they won’t have to suffer to make more of it.

Ironically, people who follow their hearts often end up with plenty of money, because they usually become highly proficient at their work and they enjoy working long hours. Loving your job is the ultimate freedom. It means, in effect, that you never have to work—you just play hard and collect your check. You can’t beat that for leisure.

Some people, though, are rich without having to work. They inherit money, marry someone who’s rich, win the lottery, or make their fortune early in life. It looks as if they’ve got it made. But science clearly shows that these people have happiness levels that are only very slightly higher than average. Usually, having a lot of money and no obligations feels good for only a short time. Boredom soon sets in, along with a feeling of worthlessness. Too much leisure is oppressive, a void that’s impossible to fill.

Popularity: 17% [?]

Making Others Feel Good Through Flattery

An important step in becoming an effective flatterer is to understand why flattery helps you establish better relationships with others. The root cause of the power of flattery gets at a basic principle of human behavior: People crave being appreciated. The vast majority of people from varying cultures desire recognition. In Asian cultures the desire for group recognition is generally stronger than the desire for individual recognition. Nevertheless, the need for recognition exists.

The joy of work may be a powerful motivator, but even those who get the biggest feeling of excitement from their work such as scientists, visual artists, and photographers crave flattery and recognition. Otherwise they would not compete for Nobel prizes or enter their work in important exhibitions.

Another reason flattery is so effective relates to the normal need to be recognized. Despite all that has been written and preached about positive reinforcement, most people receive precious little positive feedback. Flattering a person who has not received a compliment in a long time is as powerful as giving a glass of water to a very thirsty person. Many people hardly ever receive compliments either on the job or at home, thus intensifying their demand for flattery.

The insecurity that many people feel contributes to the effectiveness of flattery. These people would like to think they are doing their job well, being a good family person, or making a contribution in community service. Yet they are not certain, and because of this less-than-complete confidence in the value of their contribution, they welcome external validation. Flatter a person with lurking insecurity and you have drawn that person toward you. Can you remember a time when you felt insecure while performing a new job? How did you feel when someone whose opinion you respected tells you that you are doing a great job?

Flattery is also effective because many people expect charming and tactful people to flatter. If you withhold all flattery, you run the risk of not being perceived as charming and tactful. Given that charm and tact contribute to magnetism, and people are more likely to perceive you as magnetic if you flatter them.

To not flatter others can be a serious career drawback. You can lose out in competition with those who combine good job in performance with the ability to flatter. One study on how advancement was achieved at the top levels in major business corporations concluded that a company’s top workers tend to be equal in performance. So advancing was based 30% on image and 50% on face-to-face contacts with the boss. Flattery enters the picture because it can play a big part in enhancing one’s image and in contacts with one’s superiors.

Popularity: 17% [?]

The Eight Energies

In the late nineties I developed a program called the Amazing Momentum Generator with my then business partner, Jeffrey D. Brown.

Jeff and I identified what we called the “Seven Synergies” - the seven key areas of life that define its overall quality. Most programs focus on individual areas of life as though they have little to no effect on the others. Jeff and I saw something different; that each area is interrelated and dependent on the others - there’s a synergy. And also that there is a necessary foundation, a hierarchy, that needs to be developed to move forward with optimal success.

Here are the “Seven Synergies” - or the “Eight Energies” as I now call them.

1. Spiritual
2. Emotions and Intellect
3. Health and Fitness
4. Environment
5. Relationships
6. Recreation
7. Career
8. Finances

I’ll write more about each in the future, but what I want to share today is a new insight - and an experiment I’m going to put into action soon.

Most of us enjoy 16 hours of waking time in a day. How is your time divided up into each of the 8 categories above.

It seems logical that an ideally balanced life would devote 2 hours per day to each of the 8 areas; but the reality is that most of our time is spent in a few of the categories - and no time is spent in some (and those some may be the most important places for time to be spent).

I have reached a level of financial success in my life that many would envy. The cost has been spending most of my time in the “Career” category (and you’ll notice that I distinguish between career and finances because most people use career as a way of making money, but it doesn’t have to be that way once you see beyond the “employee mentality”).

Since money is the measuring card and we’ll assume that all of my money comes from career activities, what if I only worked 2 hours per day? At first glance, that doesn’t sound like enough - but how many hours of your work day are TRULY productive?

About 2?

What financial impact would there be if I spent more time improving my environment? What financial impact would there be if I worked to develop relationships for 2 hours per day? Those could be business relationships and personal - I’ll admit that on the average day I spend nowhere near 2 hours focused on DEVELOPING relationships. What if I spent 2 hours per day working on my health and fitness? My emotions and intellect? My spiritual base?

To some, this sounds crazy, I’m sure - but, each of these areas feeds the other areas and if one or two (or three, four or five) of these areas are incomplete and ignored than it’s like an 8-cylinder engine running on 3 cylinders. The result is a lot of miss firing and the vehicle (me) is nowhere near optimal efficiency.

So, my friend, give this some thought. I’ll keep you posted and let you know how it’s going for me.

All the best to you, John

Popularity: 33% [?]

How to get instant joy in 5 minutes

Do you want instant peace and joy in your life today? Here is what you do: Watch a child play…

What is so exciting about watching children play? Well if you look very closely you will see the magic that they possess. You can marvel in just how powerful their ability to “believe” is. If you ask a child what their dreams are they will pour out such wonderful fantasies of desires with 100% faith that their little world of belief is real and that nothing can touch it.

This might sound silly but in order to take control of your life, accomplish your goals, and truly go for your heart’s desire then you are going to have to become a kid again. You are going to have to re-learn how to dream big dreams, how to create images of your desires in your head at all times, and your mind will have to be willing to accept that anything is possible – just like you used to when you were a little boy or little girl.

You see, in order to set and reach big goals you are first going to have to pretend that you have already reached the goal. You are going to have to act as if you already have in your possession that which you desire. And this my friend, takes mental effort, especially as an adult whose mind has been so conditioned over the years to forget about that magic, that energy, that ability to reach far beyond the stars for what you deserve to have in life.

Are you ready for a really fun question? Are you ready to bring back that childhood imagination and power of creation? Here it goes: What ‘one thing’ would you set out to accomplish if you had all of the money in the world, all of the time in the world, and with nothing to stop you?

Think about that question really hard, get a pen and paper, and just pour out your soul. Write every answer that you can imagine. Remember, there are no limits here. This goal setting exercise requires your complete willingness to think without boundaries, without limitations.

What would be the first thing you would do? Where would you go? Who would you see? What would you do with your money? What would you buy? How would you dress? What kind of activities would you get involved in?

Don’t let go! Do not let go of this list that you have created. Each morning and each night you are to pull out this list, read each desire and goal that you wrote down, and then ‘pretend’ that you have already reached your goals. See yourself as if you are living with all of your hopes and dreams in the present time. Do this everyday. It’s time to become a kid again and take back the happiness and joy from life that you have been missing all of these years.

Popularity: 24% [?]

The Keys To Happiness

Everyone wants to be happy, yet many people base their happiness on whether they have what they want or whether they want what they have. Doing so puts their emotions on a roller coaster that’s controlled by what happens in their lives.

One key to happiness is humility. The reason is simple: Humility reduces stress. Humble people don’t believe that they have to have all the answers; consequently, they don’t have to fake having those answers, which reduces anxiety. When anxiety goes down, happiness goes up. Humility certainly improves your relationships. A humble approach enables you to be genuinely interested in and to respect other people. And they, in turn, become genuinely interested in you.

Another key to happiness is your willingness to accept that happiness is a “here” and a “now” - you can’t wait for it to come to you. Will Rogers said it well: “Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.”

Of course, certain activities increase your chances of being happy - for example, when you do something for someone else for purely altruistic reasons and have nothing to gain except delight in rendering a favor or doing a good turn. Committing selfless acts is a major step toward real happiness.

Popularity: 24% [?]

Spiritual goals can make us better human beings

We set goals to lose inches, to accumulate pounds and dollars, to turn our company around or to vote out a ruling party. But we don’t set spiritual goals. Why? Is it because our body is more important than the soul? Or the soul is too abstract an entity to be cared for?

One doesn’t know. However, just as we set goals for our worldly pleasures, we should set goals for our soul too. This is what wise men have taught us for centuries, but we have not followed. Maybe, if we do we may become different beings.

What we need to remember is that spiritual goals are not in competition with our daily life. However, just as our body benefits from cleansing, exercise and caring, so does our spirit. We find time for basics like brushing our teeth and combing our hair. So, why can’t we find the time for spiritual basics like contemplation and meditation?

Spiritual development is very personal. Everyone must find his own truth. That in itself is one of the biggest goals. It teaches us not to become attached to the worldly goals because they are all relative, and which we will leave behind when we leave the earth.

Spiritual goals like other goals require endurance. We should know our purpose and focus on it with full concentration. Masters down the ages have reached enlightenment not by blurting Eureka but through focused seeking.

Spiritual goals are intangible and therefore we can never measure them. However, we can always review our spiritual goals periodically like we review other goals, and reward ourselves if we feel that we have made some progress on the spiritual path.

We must remember that the creator is within us and that our goals will make us travel inwards to him. There can be no bigger reward than this.

Popularity: 17% [?]